A praise kink is all about getting turned on by compliments, approval, and verbal adoration. especially during sex or intimate moments. This can be as simple as a “Good girl,” “Such a clever boy,” or “You’re doing so well.” It’s not just about being polite; it’s about that electric jolt of pleasure you feel when someone you trust tells you exactly how amazing you are. For some, praise is about feeling wanted and seen; for others, it’s about giving up control (and being pleasantly surprised by the outcome) or getting a confidence boost.
Most humans are wired to enjoy affirmation – it’s literally how we’re socialised, from the first time someone clapped for us using a potty, to that last win at work. When praise is sexualised, it taps into those feel-good chemicals like dopamine and oxytocin. But in the bedroom, it’s also about the power dynamic: One partner takes on a role of coach, cheerleader, or proud observer, and the other gets to bask in approval. Sometimes, it’s even mixed with a bit of gentle dominance or submission, depending on what language is used. That means words aren’t just words, they can actually shape the way you experience touch, arousal, and trust.
Praise can be as simple as “You’re so sexy” or as tailored as “I love the way you moan when I touch you.” It might show up as enthusiastic encouragement (“Just like that, you’re amazing”) or whispered affirmations (“You make me feel incredible”). Sometimes, it’s paired with affectionate pet names or instructions (“Good boy, keep going” or “You’re such a tease and I love it”). You can even play with it outside the bedroom; think flirty texts, affectionate notes, or voice messages that leave your partner glowing for days.
Praise can also be layered with other kinks. If you’re into dominance and submission, for example, praise can be a gentle form of “domming” (think: “Good girl, you’re following instructions perfectly”). Or it can stand on its own, as a way of building trust, boosting confidence, or just making each other feel really good.
As with all kinks, communication is key. If you want to explore a praise kink, talk to your partner about what words and phrases feel good, what’s off limits, and what feels too performative. Remember, praise should never be used to manipulate or pressure – if it doesn’t feel authentic, it can fall flat. The best praise feels genuine, specific, and safe.
A praise kink isn’t just about being told you’re good in bed! It’s about feeling valued and seen. Whether you’re the one giving the metaphorical gold stars or collecting them, don’t be afraid to ask for what makes you feel amazing. Everyone deserves a little “Good job, you!” every now and then.
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